burning questions of life

...alternatively, Pointless Things I Think About When Home Alone And Am Too Lazy To Actually Look Up.

1. Why is cottage cheese called cottage cheese? It's not like Play-doh or something, so you can't make cottages out of it... Was it originally made in cottages?

And, since it is called that, why is there no packaging that has little pictures of cottages on it? THAT WOULD BE SO CUTE. Marketing industry, you're really missing out on something here.

2. Why would anyone buy this?

I mean really, you'd sound like a sleigh and possibly poke someone in the eye. (Actually scratch that, I'm hoping no one's face is quite that close to your chest...)

3. How is it possible that girls back in the Victorian Era weren't completely overweight? THEY SAT AND ATE CHOCOLATE. How is this fair? Why was I not born then? I could totally drink all that tea! YAY TEA!

4. How do you walk in these things?

Is there some kind of High Heel School I missed out on? I trip over my own feet without any shoes on...

5. Why are bathing suits so expensive? THEY'RE TINY SCRAPS OF FABRIC. And yet they can be more expensive than a nice sundress. Let's all rebel and just go swimming in our clothes! (Or underwear, if you're feeling daring. Or, I suppose, nothing at all... maybe not in broad daylight, though.)


6. (This probably falls under the category of "no one cares but me"...) Why is it that Stars' only Canadian shows are with Metric? I DON'T WANT TO GO SEE METRIC. I just want to see Stars! 


7. Why do none of my friends think that Ninja Cupcake would be an amazing name for a band? Come on, you know it's great. We could all wear adorable shirts like this!

Because everyone knows that cupcakes are wonderful, bands are wonderful, and ninjas are the coolest things ever... so why not combine them?

Are there any burning questions that have been bugging you? Any answers for mine?

mysteries of the universe

Why is it that, whenever I sleep in, I'm more tired for the rest of the morning? Why is that, in winter, the school's air conditioning is on full blast but in summer we boil in our own sweat? (I bet you got a wonderful mental image there. You're welcome!) Is my laptop about to explode? (Judging from the clouds of smoke it's exuding, it's possible.) Why does 'defenestrated' sound so dirty?

I think my tanning/studying session (okay, mostly tanning... must look gorgeous for prom!) yesterday may have fried a couple of brain cells. (As well as leaving Sharpie all over me. Apparently it bleeds off plastic when hot... Note to self, don't put binders on legs unless you want vaguely obscene marks all over your legs.)  I've been writing  this entry for the better part of  an hour, and this is all I have. I keep getting distracted (MUTANT SQUIRREL!) by deep questions like: how can I work to achieve world peace?

....NO. IT'S ALL LIES! My actual thoughts: do I have split ends?  (Hard to tell with the blue.) Will the teacher notice if I take a nap? (The answer to that is yes and a ruler smacked across my head.) Does that girl have a bird nesting in her hair? (I think I can see a beak poking out...) Should I study bio or just watch Vampire Diaries for the 80935th time? (Priorities, priorities...)  

I apologise for the uselessness of this post... to remedy it slightly, I will post this awesome song for you! (Mystery 18734- how many times can I listen to this song without my brain exploding?)

Happy Monday! How was your weekend?

busking is not prostitution

I thought I should make that clear right away, just so that there was no confusion. When I asked how to apply for a licence at City Hall, the woman manning (or should I say womanning?) the desk literally recoiled in her chair, eyes bugging out, and said, "We don't hold with that kind of thing here." I couldn't think of anything to say, so I just left, metaphorical tail tucked between my legs.

(Really, though, what did she think I meant? Does she just really not like live entertainment? Did she somehow hear 'stripping'?)

Whatever her problem was, I eventually managed to find a licence (she was wrong. No one else at City Hall seemed to have a problem- in fact, they seemed excited. Hopefully they weren't confused too...) and began playing with two of my friends at the farmer's market. We made a decent amount of money and had an indecent amount of fun. (For the amount of money we made. Again, don't worry- no hanky-panky!)

This was last year. Fast-forward (...and we're taking on the world together, there's a drawer of my things at your place...one of our best songs) to yesterday... and we're freezing our fingers off playing for no one. Apparently, farmer's markets in 2011 are far more exciting than ones in 2012- maybe people fear that the end of the world is coming, and have decided that they have better things to do now? My only response to that is "NO! There is nothing better for you to do with your life than come give me money!"

I really could do without the random questions, though. Yesterday, one man asked us, "So, are you going to college or going to jail?" (I still haven't figured out if he was serious or not...) Another day, someone asked us if we played in a hole. What does that even mean? Did it look like we were subterranean trolls? Is it a song? (If so, why not say so?) 

I just reread this post and realised it had absolutely no point... so the point is, give money to people busking (especially if they're a group of three blonde girls, cough cough) because even a dollar makes them happy! (There. You may now thank me, buskers of the world.)