off to the races

Finally! It's Friday! We are no longer lost in the maze of the week!

Seriously. This week has not been a good one for mental clarity. So far I have
a) started eating dates because I thought they were chocolate chips (...)
b) forgotten to bring coffee (yes this is a serious deal)
c) been too lazy to do anything but read most of the time (although admittedly that's fairly frequent)
d) nearly been blown away in all the wind
e) worn a bandana (I can't decide if this was a clever fashion move or if I should be singing country songs)

...okay so maybe it was a fairly typical week. STILL. I appreciate the upcoming long weekend! (Thank you, Queen Victoria. However, although I have done the requisite readings about you- requisited by myself, actually, when I was going through my princess phase- I still don't know why we have a day off dedicated to your birthday... but I am still grateful.)

This weekend also marks my visit to... well, I'm not quite sure what to call it in English. French party camp? With lots of weird ceremonies (seriously, all these people are getting awards that I have never heard of.Why don't they just give me an award for my amazing Great Gatsby shirt?) and clapping (I actually hate clapping so much. How is loud, annoying noise supposed to mean congratulations?) and lots of packing...

But all the crazy dancing more than makes up for it!

Last year I had tons of fun, so let's hope that it's just as wonderful this year! I like to think I'm a better dancer now, so that might help. (However, I suspect it's just that I am better at lying to myself.) I also know how to do a messy bun, which should help disguise the sweatiness of my hair... gross, but useful... and I own actual workout shorts, so I don't have to wear pajamas! (...no of course I didn't do that last year, who wears short pajama shorts and pretends they're a dance outfit? -shifty eyes-)

Happy weekend, ninjas! (Even if you're not lucky enough to live here and have three days, muahaha)

what I'd like to be known for

Do you ever see connections within the TV shows you're watching? Or the conversations you're having? Or the books you're reading? I don't mean just mentioning the same thing to several people, or watching only crime shows. The connections I'm thinking of are subtler, harder to trace. A character in one novel might prefer an orange dress; a friend will happen to mention that she's been buying a lot of orange clothes. At first it seems coincidental, but as the events keep piling up, they seem to be pointing you further and further in the same direction.

This is the way I've been feeling lately. This quote, and others like it, have been appearing in snippets everywhere:

“One day, you’re seventeen and you’re planning for someday. 

And then quietly, without you ever really noticing, someday is today. 

And then someday is yesterday. And this is your life.”

― John Green

This terrifies me.

I feel like it's a warning: stop thinking you can plan anything. Stop thinking you have time to waste. (Which is a good thing... but I panic, and then can do nothing.) Do you ever have times when you feel paralysed, caught in time, waiting for something to happen? I feel as though my life has been put on pause, and I'm not quite sure why.

For this reason, this list, from Moorea Seal's list project, was surprisingly difficult for me to write, because I don't know what I want.

(is this clear enough? if not, please tell me so I can change it for next time)

On the whole, this seems fairly comprehensive... it also makes me wonder, am I already some of these things? If people who know me read this, would they laugh at just how off the mark I am? (I hope not.)

One notable exception (in my mind, at least) to this list was smart. I have been known for being smart my entire life, and I'm so tired of it. Being known as 'the smart girl' is exhausting and, in a way, dehumanising. You're not supposed to have weaknesses. You're supposed to be the one who has the answers, who doesn't care what other people think of you because you're just the brain... but that is not all I am.

What about you? What do you want to be known for?

the problems I (of my) face

Some days, you just realise that a thousand tiny annoyances are following you around like biting flies. (Which are a trial all on their own. Why do they exist? Shouldn't our blood have evolved to be poisonous yet?) Here are some of the things that have been bothering me lately. 

-My pores. There are so many words to describe them right now, and none of them are pretty. (Some of them even begin with p for added alliterative appeal!) Let's say... pestilential, puffy, pustulous... I think you get the idea. To conceal them, I applied a mud face mask... 

...and wore it all day to school.

Okay, not really.

But I wanted to. It would have been prettier than the reality.

-The weather. For a week, it was glorious and hot and summer and I just lolled about eating smoothies. Now it is raining and feels like summer's already over. Can't we at least have a thunderstorm? 

-My shirt. I love this shirt so much.

(source)

Mine is even more beautiful because it's a gorgeous, deep ocean blue! I just want to wear it everywhere and with every possible combination of the rest of my wardrobe. Last night I had a mini fashion show- very mini, because I was both sole model and sole audience member- and tried it on with almost all my bottoms (okay that sounds like I have different butt sizes to try it with but you get the idea right?) and it totally worked. Literature is a magical force...but I can't wear it all the time. So sad. (Although, if I did, the smell might begin to repel people after a while... hmmm... ways to be antisocial are always appreciated...)

-The ending of I Capture the Castle. This is one of my favourite books... but the ending has always saddened me. (No spoilers, I promise!) Usually, I'm fairly good at inventing alternate stories for characters I think have been cheated (I spend far too much time lost within the pages of books not to!) but I've read this one far too many times to change its story.

(source)

Just read it. Or watch it. Then we can have a deep discussion about it and I can cry. (Too many feels okay.)

-I'm choking. There has been an Advil capsule stuck in my throat since LAST NIGHT. How has it not dissolved yet? Can someone please explain this? All day, every time I swallowed something, I could feel it blocking my nutritional passageways. (Yes. That is a scientific term. Just accept it, as we say in Chemistry whenever we don't understand something.)

...and, just to cap it all off:  

(source)

(Garfield, you and I are soulmates.) What have some of your problems been lately? 

sunny days playlist

Exactly what the title says- a playlist of songs to listen to during a sunny day, to keep you in a happy mood! It's sad just how long it took me to make this... most of the songs I listen to are of the "dying-of-a-broken-heart" variety (no, I am not a country girl. None of them involve trucks) so compiling this one took quite a few scrolls through my iPod. (Yes. I still have an iPod with a click wheel, and I hope it never breaks. Am I the only one?) However, I didn't mind because doing this made me feel like Charlie, putting together a mixtape. (Yes. I do think too much about characters who don't actually exist.)

So, without further ado... here are some happy songs! (Links to Youtube provided, so you have no excuse not to listen!)

1- 22, by Taylor Swift. (Even if you're not a fan of hers, you've got to admit that this is a great song for dancing around and generally acting like an idiot.)

2- Crazy in Love, by Emeli Sandé. (I just had to include something from the Great Gatsby!... and yes, it did fulfill all my wildest hopes and dreams, thanks for asking)

3- How to be a Heartbreaker, by Marina & the Diamonds. (I'm not certain if this is altogether good advice... but it's fun, and that's all that matters!)

4- Spaghetti, by Darelle London. (Too. Cute. Eating spaghetti, watching Breakfast at Tiffany's, and hang-gliding- which I don't know how to spell- must mean true love.)

5- Home, by Edward Sharpe & The Magnetic Zeros. 
(This song is just so bouncy! It just makes me want 
to skip down the street... I wouldn't advise that.)

6- Stupid, by Brendan Maclean. (Let's face it, we all know people like this...)

7- I've Just Seen a Face, by Jim Sturgess- Beatles cover. (That accent. Swoon.) 

8- B.C. Orienteering, by Said the Whale. (Who doesn't love a song about hiking?)

9- First Dance, by Never Shout Never. (Another one that'll make you feel like dancing. 
Can't you just picture spinning round and round with a floaty skirt?...
or an otherwise nice outfit if you're a guy or don't like skirts, 
I don't want to discriminate) 

10- Skinny Genes, by Eliza Doolittle. (This is the one song that makes me wish I could 
whistle so I could sing it properly...)

11- Summer Nights, by Florrie. (Ending with a super-energizing song- go out for a run! 
Or tan, because it seems appropriately summery.) 

Have you heard any of these songs? Did you like them? 

home & energy (in lists!)

...and if that title didn't entice you, I'm not sure what could. Doesn't it sound like a boring radio ad for an energy-efficient fridge? ( (I know, I'm such a saleswoman. However, at least I'm better than one of my friends, who once tried to convince me NOT to buy something from her for a fundraiser. It's a wonder she managed to raise any money... although given my own experiences, I should be more sympathetic.)

Or perhaps it's imploring you to turn off the lights in your house, so I don't have to pop up and do it myself. (Us ninjas prefer the darkness. We're also very environmentally conscious.)

However (my graceful segue word in every occasion, from essays to awkward conversations) that is not actually what this post is about. I have no interest in fridges (other than the fact that they hold food! And food is good! Yay for food!)- today, I'm actually sharing two more of my lists from Moorea Seal's list project.

Week 12: things that feel like home. 

...so it's pretty easy to see that, for the most part, feeling at home means being alone. In the quiet. In the dark. (Again, this can all be explained by my inherent ninja-ness.)

Week 18: ways I'm energized. 

Of course coffee is the first on the list! (Priorities.) Funny how several of these ended up being similar to the previous list, despite having been done weeks apart.

What makes you feel at home? What energises you?

Also: The Great Gatsby comes out on Friday. Excuse me while I pass out from excitement. (NoI'mnotobsessed,whywouldyousaythat?)

university woes

As a soon-to-go-to university student (come on now. Admit that sounds far better than mere "grade 12 student") finances are a big concern. To be completely honest, mostly I try not to think about it. (Popcorn is cheap, right? And apples? If those were my two main food groups, I could survive!) 

...that is, when I'm not applying to scholarships. 

Did any of you apply to scholarships when you went off to school? How many essays did you write? (Honestly, my convictions on such varied subjects as Timing in Jane Austen and Worker's Rights are beginning to astound even me. Hopefully the judges feel the same!) Honestly, even though I'm a good writer, it's exhausting. (Although far better than the essays I have to write for French class... despite my growing ability to make things up when I have nothing to say, there is REALLY nothing I have to say on Agriculture in 18th-Century Quebec.) 

Also, I am of fairly average physical appearance. Meaning... I am neither tall enough to apply for the Tall Girl Scholarship, nor short enough to apply for the Short Girl scholarship. (These are really things.) Even more average, I have no desire to belong to a nudist colony... YES. There is a scholarship for people who want to join a nudist colony. WHY. (Seriously, I don't understand this mainly because there are so many gorgeous clothes out there. Why waste the opportunity?) 

However, I have still managed to find a few to apply to. My most recent one is the S-Trip Scholarship, in which I am even able to win a trip! (Let's face it, travelling is just the best.) 

(And, well... I just look so good doing it, too. Always a consideration.) 

However, I need supporters. I just need six more people... and I have only eight days left... and I'd really appreciate if some of you could help me out! All you need to do is sign up and say that you support me. (Yay for clicking a link!) Here's my lovely profile!

Thanks for dropping by, and happy Monday! 

things at which I could win a prize

The other night, I went to go see my friends perform at a major (for this town) music festival. (Shoutout to Declan, Anna and Cécile- you were amazing!) As is often the case, watching all of these wonderful performers made me feel... a little inadequate. (You know how I used to talk about playing guitar? Haven't done that since last summer. Sigh.) So, I thought I'd list some other talents of mine that I could totally win awards for!

-Pie appreciation. Honestly, I know no one who loves pie as much as I do. (The same goes for popcorn. Although, in both cases, I admit to snobbery- only pie with real fruit, and only air-popped popcorn.) Why is it that pie-eating competitions exist, but none for sheer love of it? What a sad world we live in.

-Reading. I am, hands-down, the fastest reader I know. (Upon initial glance, this doesn't seem like that useful a skill... but it means that homework assignments take me approximately half the time they take anyone else.) If there was a speed-reading and comprehension contest, I would definitely win.

-Protein baking. If I am baking something, it's almost a guarantee that I will find a way to insert more protein into it- necessary vegetarian skillz. (However, if you're going to attempt this skill, a word of caution: don't tell people that you've tried to make the dessert healthy until they've actually finished eating it. For some reason, my efforts do not recieve proper recognition.)

-Writing. Does this seem a little egotistical? Maybe. However, it's true- I'm a very good writer. (You don't see my true skills because my blog posts tend to be a little more rushed than my more serious writing, aka stories and essays. But, no bragging intended, those are quite good.)

-Being awkward. Really. No one ever sees this as a good thing, but look on the bright side- if I'm around, everyone will think of you as being far more attractive and put-together in comparison! (However, this one might be decreasing. At this same event, I had TWO conversations with an attractive boy and managed to sound entirely normal for both of them! -major pride-)

-Making lists. I am the List Queen. I make to-do lists every single day, not because I think I'll forget (sample list: shower. Make breakfast. Exercise) but because it helps me feel organised and in control. (WHEN EVERYTHING IS GOING WRONG AROUND ME! -drama-)

What are some skills you'd like to recieve more recognition for?